Parents Universal Resource Experts: Summer Homework
Is your teen in summer school? Connect with Kids offers an interesting article regarding academics and your child’s summer time. The parenting tips are definitely worth reviewing.
Source: Connect with Kids
“It is wonderful for that to be a relaxing time and I fully agree that all kids need time to relax. But they may not need two or three solid months of no exposure to books or information or math.”
– Joanne Max, Ph.D., Psychologist, explaining that a little bit of summer homework is a good thing.
<!–a href=”#” target=”_blank”></a–>Studies from three different universities are confirming what some educators have called “the summer brain drain”: the two months worth of knowledge kids lose over the summer. Keeping them academically busy over the summer is one answer, but it is controversial.
While some kids spend their summer playing, straight-‘a’ students Grace and Mark will be reading, reading, and reading some more.
Not because they want to, though. It’s a school assignment.
“The whole summer I’m not really just enjoying it and thinking school’s out,” says Mark, 13, “I’m thinking ‘oh I have to read those books then go back to school.”
“Ideally my summer would be where I got to do what I wanted to do and kind of not worry about academics so much,” adds 15-year-old Grace.
Even some parents and educators agree. “There’s no time to recharge. It seem like a lot of their time is being sucked up,” says Author and education expert Adam Robinson.
“They need a break,” agrees Mark and Grace’s mother, Mary Loveland, “Just like they need a break on weekends, they need a break in the summer. To be kids. Because I don’t think we let them be kids.”
Still, experts say summer homework is a trend that’s unlikely to go away. So parents should first: Keep it in perspective and explain to the child that a little bit of summer homework is a good thing.
“It was wonderful for that to be a relaxing time and I fully agree that all kids need time to relax,” says Joanne Max, Ph.D., a psychologist, “But they may not need two or three solid months of no exposure to books or no information or math.”
Second: Help them budget their time. Even Mark says his summer homework would be much less of a hassle if he did a little each day. “But I usually cram it in on the last few weeks,” he admits.
Tips for Parents
Whether homework is assigned during the school year, or as a “summer bridge” between grades, parents can help their children get it done. In fact, the American Federation of Teachers (AFT) says parents can help their children academically, even if homework is not assigned. The AFT describes the home as “a child’s first school” and recommends spending a little time each day on reading, writing and math activities.
According to the U. S. Department of Education, students and parents should expect the following amounts of homework:
- From kindergarten to third grade, no more than 20 minutes per day.
- From fourth to sixth grade, between 20 to 40 minutes per day.
- From seventh to ninth grade, students can expect to spend up to two hours on homework each day.
- High school students often need to study more than two hours each day.
The American Medical Association has some specific suggestions on ways parents can help children with homework:
- Help them get organized – It can be hard to schedule homework time into our kids’ busy lives, but that is exactly what we must do. Prioritizing homework tells your kids that learning, reading and studying are important. If you need to, post a weekly calendar with slots for daily homework time.
- Help them find the right workspace – Where your child should do homework depends largely on your child’s age. The workspace should be well lighted and supplied with pencils, paper, rulers and books so kids don’t waste time hunting for tools. The kitchen or dining room table is the most popular workspace for young children.
- Let the child do the work – Young children in particular are accustomed to being helped with many tasks, so they naturally look to parents for help with homework. Remember that a primary goal of homework is to build responsibility. Here, yours is a supporting role as a parent, encouraging your child to think, evaluate and respond. Parents can help the child understand instructions but should then step back and let the child work independently. It is important that a parent does not actually do the work because this denies the child an essential sense of achievement. Praise should be focused on the child’s effort, rather than on “correct” or “incorrect.”
- Be a parent, not a teacher – The most important role parents can play is as a parent. It is important not to become the teacher at home. The parent can scan the assignment first to become familiar with it. That way, if the child has trouble finding the answer, the parent can offer a clue and then let the child find the answer. This approach helps build the child’s confidence that he/she can, indeed, do the work on his/her own. Parents should be ready with praise when the assignment is completed.
- Final Checkout – Parents should check homework assignments for completion before they are handed in. This not only gives you an indication of your child’s ability, but it also keeps you up-to-date on what he/she is studying. If you do find errors, don’t criticize. If your child is really struggling, send a note to the teacher pointing out the difficulties your child had with that assignment. By going over homework with your child, you can see whether there are any problems that need to be addressed.
The AFT also recommends that parents reward their children for work well done, or for trying hard, even when they make mistakes. The rewards don’t have to cost money. A hug or a smile and some words of praise can mean more than candy or a toy.
References
- American Federation of Teachers
- American Medical Association
- U.S. Department of Education
Add comment July 11, 2009
Sue Scheff: Helping Your Teens Budget their Time, Money this Summer
Another great parenting website, School Family - your go-to-guide for school success offers a tremendous amount of educational articles, parenting tips, information to help you guide your way through your child’s school years. Here is one of their recent articles on helping your teen manage their time and money this summer.
Help Your Teen Budget Time, Money This Summer
For many teens, the summer paycheck is the first “real” money they’ve ever had. And some have a tendency to spend every cent they make on clothes, CDs, and entertainment.
You can teach your teen a valuable lesson by insisting that he make a budget for his money. Included in the budget should be a regular savings plan—both for things he’d like to buy in the near future (for example, a personal digital media player) and for college or other education after high school.
If he doesn’t have a summer job, perhaps you can find ways to help him earn some money this summer. He could offer to baby-sit, for example, or do chores for an older neighbor who can’t manage by herself.
While you’re at it, have your teen make a time budget, too. It’s normal for teens to lounge around. But when they spend day after day in front of the TV, they’ll be bored at best, and possibly even depressed. Besides, kids tend to get into trouble if they have too much time on their hands.
Teens respond well to choices. If your teen seems to show no interest in getting off the couch, give her a choice of things she might do: organize the family photo albums, take neighborhood kids to the pool in the afternoon, volunteer at an animal shelter. When you give teens projects to do, you not only help them manage their time—you keep them interested in life.
Copyright © 2009 Parent Institute
Add comment July 7, 2009
Parents Universal Resoruce Experts – Sue Scheff – Mommy Perks
People that know me, know I always share parenting ideas, articles, books, websites and more. Today, well, it is more! It is Mommy Perks! I am sure there are many mom’s and dad’s out there that would enjoy being part of a parenting network – check this out! As a Parent Advocate, I loved all these ideas to help reach out to more families.
What is Mommy Perks?
About Mommy Perks
Click here to see what others are saying about Mommy Perks.
Meet Shara Lawrence-Weiss, owner of Mommy Perks:
Prior to purchasing Mommy Perks, I was a Mommy Perk Rep. I then become co-owner and later, sole owner. Over the last few years I have researched, read, studied, watched and compared a variety of marketing and networking trends. I have modified the way that Mommy Perks runs based on those changes and the needs of small business owners.
Many mom-owned sites are now selling advertising space. In my experience, these ad spots almost never turn sales. From time to time they do but not often. What does turn sales for a small business? Especially a niche business? Well, word of mouth is a big part of the equation. As a Mommy Perks client, I will personally buy your product (if possible) and test it, use it, blog about it and more. I will do this in order to truly understand what you do and how you do it. I can then refer to you others honestly and without reservation. Research shows that 3rd party endorsements are far more effective than self-plugging. Of course you’ll say your own product is terrific, right? That will quickly go over many heads. If someone else is promoting you, though, the chances that your product or service will gain more attention are far higher.
I know this to be the case based on numerous factors. One of those factors is my other business: Personal Child Stories. When I first signed up with Mommy Perks as an advertiser (back in 2007), my graphic ad was placed on the website. Nothing came. Nothing happened. I got visits to my website but no sales. Since that time, I have built relationships with people – through the Mommy Perks site. Lots of book sales have occurred based on those relationships; the networking, marketing, word of mouth, having others refer me out and so on. By working together as a team far more has been accomplished. Newsletter sign ups, book sales, new friends made.
That is my ultimate goal with each business that I serve and help. To help them plant seeds and to teach them to water those seeds. It all takes time. Nothing grows over night (other than bacteria but let’s not go there).
Patience and perseverance, I always say. Slow and steady wins the race. Why spend money on flat ads being placed on a website with no PR to back your money? Other sites charge even more than Mommy Perks just to place your graphic on their site. Why not spend the money more wisely?
Welcome to the Mommy Perks way of thinking 
Click here to visit our Ad and PR Packages page.
Why join the Mommy Perks Community?
We have been turning the heads of some big names lately and continue to gain more media attention across the country for our small business philosophies. Mommy Perks is the BIG place for SMALL business!
We are a COMMUNITY of moms, small businesses, friends and family. We offer:
- A one-stop shopping experience
- Free Membership to shop the discounts
- Free ads for mom’s groups and non-profits
- Our popular VIP Blog: free business reviews, giveaways, freebies and more
- Enter to Win contests each month for members
- Informative eNewsletters sent 1-2 times per month
- Newsletter giveaways exclusive to members
- Periodic email specials/discounts sent on behalf of our partners (advertisers)
- Kid’s Corner with tips, crafts, articles and more
- GreenScene: simple green living tips
- Affordable advertising for any family friendly business or service
Join our growing community today and let others know they too can get PERKED!
Once we receive your information you will get a membership card in a Welcome email. You can use your membership card and code to save on purchases online and in stores locally and nationally.
Check back often to find new partners and perks at http://mommyperks.com
Add comment July 1, 2009
Parents Universal Resource Experts – Sue Scheff – At-Risk Youth Programs
The Army National Guard’s Partners in Education program connects schools, teachers, and students with free Army National Guard educational resources, from classroom presentations to programs for at-risk youth. Classroom
presentations can be requested online, and topics include:
Partners In Education (www.partnersineducation.com), a dynamic, interactive presentation that takes students through the steps needed to prepare for life after high school.
HUMVEE School Program (www.humveeschoolprogram.com), a unique, hands-on opportunity that informs students about technical career directions while offering an up-close and personal look at the high mobility multipurpose wheeled vehicle.
YOU CAN School Program (www.youcanschoolprogram.com), an award-winning program that offers more than 30 motivational presentations organized into the following categories: health and social well-being, life betterment,
discovery, and disaster preparedness. It introduces students to necessary life skills in order to let them know that they can have successful futures and accomplish great things.
Add comment June 27, 2009
Parents Universal Resource Experts – Sue Scheff: Teen Suicide
Suicide is the third most common cause of death amongst adolescents between 15-24 years of age, and the sixth most common cause of death amongst 5-14 year olds. It is estimated that over half of all teens suffering from depression will attempt suicide at least once, and of those teens, roughly seven percent will succeed on the first try. Teenagers are especially vulnerable to the threat of suicide, because in addition to increased stress from school, work and peers, teens are also dealing with hormonal fluctuations that can complicate even the most normal situations.
Because of these social and personal changes, teens are also at higher risk for depression, which can also increase feelings of despair and the desire to commit suicide. In fact, according to a study by the National Institute of Mental Health (NIMH) almost all people who commit suicide suffer from a diagnosable mental disorder or substance abuse disorder. Often, teens feel as though they have no other way out of their problems, and may not realize that suicidal thoughts and feelings can be treated. Unfortunately, due to the often volatile relationship between teens and their parents, teens may not be as forthcoming about suicidal feelings as parents would hope. The good news is there are many signs parents can watch for in their teen without necessarily needing their teen to open up to them.
At some point in most teens’ lives, they will experience periods of sadness, worry and/or despair. While it is completely normal for a healthy person to have these types of responses to pain resulting from loss, dismissal, or disillusionment, those with serious (often undiagnosed) mental illnesses often experience much more drastic reactions. Many times these severe reactions will leave the teen in despair, and they may feel that there is no end in sight to their suffering. It is at this point that the teen may lose hope, and with the absence of hope comes more depression and the feeling that suicide is the only solution. It isn’t.
Teen girls are statistically twice as likely as their male counterparts to attempt suicide. They tend to turn to drugs (overdosing) or to cut themselves, while boys are traditionally more successful in their suicide attempts because they utilize more lethal methods such as guns and hanging. This method preference makes boys almost four times more successful in committing suicide.
Studies have borne out that suicide rates rise considerably when teens can access firearms in their home. In fact, nearly 60% of suicides committed in the United States that result in immediate death are accomplished with a gun. This is one crucial reason that any gun kept in a home with teens, even if that teen does not display any outward signs of depression, be stored in a locked compartment away from any ammunition. In fact, the ammunition should be stored in a locked compartment as well, and the keys to both the gun and ammunition compartments should be kept in a different area from where normal, everyday keys are kept. Remember to always keep firearms, ammunition, and the keys to the locks containing them, away from kids.
Unfortunately, teen suicide is not a rare event. In the United States, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) estimates that suicide is the third leading cause of death for people between the ages of 15 and 24. This disturbing trend is affecting younger children as well, with suicide rates experiencing dramatic increases in the under-15 age group from 1980 to 1996. Suicide attempts are even more prevalent, though it is difficult to track the exact rates.
Add comment June 23, 2009
Parents Universal Resource Experts – Sue Scheff: Teenage Summer Romance – Teen Relationships
Summer romance? Teenage love and relationships – learn more. Great article by Richard Hills.
By I was 17 when I had my first “real” girlfriend (yes, yes, I was a late bloomer). But in fairness that is not to say that I hadn’t fallen in love before that; what many would have called ‘crushes’. Now, as a father, I get to watch this all unfolding in front of me again with my three daughters.
To prepare writing this article I was looking for some background data on teenage love, or relationships, and while there is a ton of information out there, it was not the sort of thing I want to address here.
The scenario: I’m in the car to pick up my teenage daughter from middle school. When she gets into the car, she’s simply beaming. “How did your day go?” I ask, “Ohhhh daddy, I met this boy today and …” 30 minutes later as we arrive at home she’s still talking about him. Teenage love; do we take it seriously?
According to all the information out there on the internet, we’d better take it seriously; STD’s, teen abuse, teen sex, teen pregnancy – a plethora of information to make any father lock up his daughter in the top room of the tower and throw away the key!
But these are not the issues I wanted to talk about today. Not that they are not worthy of discussion, they are. I’ve talk about some of them already in past articles and I’ll discuss others later. But today I just wanted to talk about the feelings of love. When your son or daughter comes to you with that silly doe-eyed expression talking about love, what is our first reaction as parents? I’m sure the issues listed above come into mind, but often I think the thought of “puppy-love” comes into mind. “Oh darling, you’re too young to know what real love is”. If you are thinking that let me recommend to you that those words NEVER leave your mouth in front of your child.
Childhood love is an expression of Self. It is a display of much needed independence and moral growth at this age of development. We as parents should not minimize this in the eyes of our youth, in fact I believe it should be encouraged. David Richo, noted psychologist and author often writes about the 5 A’s (attention, affection, appreciation, acceptance, and allowing). These are attributes that we need fulfilled from a very early age. These later, in healthy relationships become the attributes that we desire to give. But we’ll never be able to give them if we never got them from our parents. So, when your teen comes to you in love, don’t dismiss those feelings as ‘puppylove’, or “you’re too young to understand” – trust me, to your teen, YOU don’t know what you are talking about.
In my research I did find an interesting article / study about teenage relationships. This study found our teenage boys have much more feelings then they are normally given credit for. I shouldn’t be surprised (having been one of those boys) – but I am a father of daughters now and the perspective is very different. If we take away our children’s love when they are young, what exactly will they have when they are older adults? It is real love, and should be treated as such. In our experience we know, just as she came bouncing to the car expressing her love, one day she will come running to the car in sorrow and pain over a lost love. Let us, as parents be there both times; first to celebrate… then to commiserate with our child’s healthy growth.
For more info: David Richo
Add comment June 20, 2009
Parents Universal Resource Experts – Sue Scheff – Summer and Teens
By Add comment June 16, 2009
Parents Universal Resource Experts – Sue Scheff – Communication with your Teenager
Sarah Newton and Lisa Warner continue to give informative and fantastic tips for parenting teens today. FINK Blog is a site you have to visit and appreciate all this valuable parenting insights, articles, resources and great tips!
Parenting Teens Tip Ten – When and how to negotiate with your teen
By Sarah Newton
MAKING AGREEMENTS WITH YOUR TEENS THAT WORK
Agreements are the things that, without a shadow of a doubt, have transformed in big way many of my client’s relationships with their children. They take the heat out of many situations and put you as the parent in control. This does not mean that you control your teenager, only that you can control your own self in the negotiation stage of agreements.
Agreements are the backbone to everyday life we make and break agreements daily. We agree to get our children to school on time, we agree to pay the mortgage and we agree to meet a friend for lunch. These are all things that, considering the options we have decided to agree on, we can at any time pull out of, if we so choose and although there will be consequences, some will be easier to break than others. Upsetting a friend over cancelled lunch arrangements may be easier than losing our house since we have not paid the mortgage, or losing our child’s place at school because we got them their late.
Whether you like it or not, your life is a series of agreements, some not so great as others but nevertheless, all agreements. You were not forced into any of them, you weighed up the alternatives and decided to agree, knowing the consequences and the impact that the agreement has upon you.
This is why it is so important that we start to make agreements with our children as early as we can because as I have said, life is full of them.
Think of the agreements you make everyday now and how they came about -are any of them rules that we must stick to? Are any of them forced upon us? Even the law in a way is a set of acceptable behaviour agreements; we can choose not to agree with them and break the law, knowing the penalty. We have that choice.
So what is common in our agreements?
1. We are generally involved in the process
2. We have the information we need to make a choice
3. We know the consequences of breaking them
4. We choose to accept them or not accept them.
So if this is how we operate in life, then why do we so often give our children a set of rules to adhere to? Not involve them in the process, expect them to abide by them without giving them the proper information and we certainly do not make it clear what will happen if they are broken…oh and then we scold them for not making a choice.
Does that seem right?
No it doesn’t! No wonder we can never get them to do anything.
OK, so what I want to do today is give you a system that you can use
Here are two definitions from the dictionary about the word agreement.
The act of agreeing or of coming to a mutual arrangement.
An arrangement that is accepted by all parties to a transaction.
This is not a clever way for you to instill rules or get your teenager to do something, it is a way of you all agreeing what is acceptable, since you all share the same house, bathroom, wallet
Think for a moment, how you get your children involved, how the house runs and how you ensure it runs smoothly – how are they involved in this? What do you have in place at the moment?
There are three main steps in making an agreement and they are listed below – we will go through these more in class.
Step one – Get clear
Before making any agreement, be clear what it is you want. Most parents skip this step and it is crucial, do you want her to do the washing up or do you want her to take more responsibility around the house? Having a conversation that starts, “Let’s talk about you taking more responsibility around the house,” is very different than, “I want you to do the washing up”. Whatever it is you think you want, ask what it is you really want, what is the bigger why?
Step two – Make the request
You are making a request of your teenagers, you are not telling them – they have the right to say yes, no or re-negotiate and you need to be ready for this. Ask for what you want and ask for a discussion around this. What you are doing here is opening the conversation up for negotiation.
Step three – Seal the deal
After negotiation, you must both be clear what has to be and when it has to be done. Some wishy-washy, “…yes I will do the washing up…” is not good enough.
Here is also where you need to have a discussion with your teenager about what will happen if the agreement is broken and although you may not know the exact consequences yet, there needs to be some discussion here about the possibility so that your teenager can agree, knowing exactly what they are getting into.
One important note to remember here are that you must come to an agreement with love. If you are making an agreement from fear it will not work.
OK so what do we do when an agreement is broken?
First we do not panic, you stay calm and let your child know that the agreement has been broken. You need to think about it and come up with a solution. Ask them to do the same.
Now there is not one-size-fits-all here and it will depend on the agreement, how it was broken and the reasons for the breach, so to speak.
Give yourself at least 24 hours and only after a discussion with your teenager come to a conclusion.
The first thing to do is look at the broken agreement and the circumstances and ask yourself if their is a remedy you could put in place to ensure that this does not happen again. A remedy is something you will put in place to ensure the agreement is not broken again. For example, if they just forgot about the agreement what could remind them?
Go into the agreements again with the remedy in place and see if that works.
If the agreement is broken again and it is obvious that another remedy is not the answer or the breaking of the agreement in the first place was so severe or no remedy could be found, then move into a penalty.
Now, I did think long and hard before using the word penalty, so in its broadest sense it does mean punishment. However, one of its definitions is loss or other unfortunate result of one action and for me, that definition did fit. If your child breaks an agreement, just like if you did, there will be some kind of loss or unfortunate event. If we don’t turn up for work we may get fired – loss of job. If we fail to meet a friend for lunch they may not be happy with us – an unfortunate result. Often, someone else, i.e. the school, may enforce a penalty. However there will be times when you as the parent need to step in. If this is the case, then discuss options with your teenager first and come to a solution that you are both happy with.
So there is the system for making agreements. We will talk through it in greater length on the call.
Before next week I just want you to think about agreements in the context of your own home. What do you do already? Where could an agreement support you more? What has and has not worked so far?
As everything the key to this is consistency without consistency this will never work.
Add comment June 13, 2009
Parents Universal Resource Experts – Sue Scheff: Parenting, Kids and Teen Health
Welcome to KidsHealth!
If you’re looking for information you can trust about kids and teens that’s free of “doctor speak,” you’ve come to the right place. KidsHealth is the most-visited site on the Web for information about health, behavior, and development from before birth through the teen years.
On a typical weekday, more than 500,000 people visit KidsHealth.
One of the things that makes KidsHealth special is that it’s really three sites in one: with sections for parents, for kids, and for teens.
KidsHealth is more than just the facts about health. As part of The Nemours Foundation’s Center for Children’s Health Media, KidsHealth also provides families with perspective, advice, and comfort about a wide range of physical, emotional, and behavioral issues that affect children and teens.
To do this, our editorial staff communicates complex medical information in language that readers can understand and use. And all KidsHealth articles, animations, games, and other content go through a rigorous medical review by pediatricians and other medical experts. Ongoing, scheduled medical reviews ensure the information is as up-to-date as possible.
Along the way, KidsHealth has received its share of recognition — among them, four Webby Awards, including for Best Family/Parenting Site and Best Health Site on the Web, the Parent’s Choice Gold Award, the Teacher’s Choice Award for Family, and the International Pirelli Award for best educational media for students.
KidsHealth cannot take the place of an in-person visit with a doctor, who can perform examinations and answer questions. But we can provide unbiased, reliable information to help you and your family pursue good health and wellness for a lifetime.
Nemours Center for Children’s Health Media
The Nemours Center for Children’s Health Media is a part of The Nemours Foundation, a nonprofit organization created by philanthropist Alfred I. duPont in 1936 and devoted to improving the health of children.
The pediatrician-led Center is unique in the nation with its exclusive focus on children’s health media — and offers a post-residency fellowship for physicians seeking to further develop their skills in health communications.
Our recent projects include The Pink Locker Society, a novel that aims to educate and entertain preteen girls; and the Healthy Habits for Life Resource Kit, a DVD and 100-page booklet — produced in collaboration with Sesame Workshop — that helps preschool teachers incorporate healthy physical activity and nutrition habits into everyday routines. We also created Fit Kids, published worldwide by Dorling Kindersley, an illustrated book to help parents keep their kids and teens eating healthy and active.
Licensable Health Information and Media Inquiries
The Center also creates children’s health information for licensed use by hospitals and corporations. Our business development team welcomes inquiries from organizations regarding collaborative or licensing projects. Requests from the media for interviews with KidsHealth experts are welcome. For permission to reprint or link to KidsHealth content, see our Permissions Guidelines.
Sponsorship Opportunities
KidsHealth offers a variety of sponsorship opportunities on KidsHealth.org; KidsHealth in the Classroom; in our weekly e-newsletters; and through offline initiatives, video, and other means. Sponsorship revenue is used to support the development of KidsHealth educational programs. We welcome you to join us in supporting families.
Tell Us What You Think
We depend on you — and our millions of other visitors — to let us know your thoughts about KidsHealth, how we have been helpful, and ways we can improve the site. If you have a correction to request, please send that along, too. I guarantee we’ll listen.
Editor-in-Chief and Founder, KidsHealthChief Executive, Nemours Center for Children’s Health MediaNemours Foundation comments@KidsHealth.org
Add comment June 10, 2009
Parents Universal Resource Experts – Sue Scheff – Balanced Parenting
“Helping families successfully balance the joys and challenges of family life”Add comment June 9, 2009
