Educational Consultants: Who Are They?

Over and over again I will hear from parents that are either considering hiring an Educational Consultant, or have hired one.

What is an Educational Consultant? (EC)  They are an individual that may or may not have qualifications to help you place your troubled teen into a treatment center.  Years ago, EC’s were mainly used for parents that needed help in finding the right colleges for their teens, help with their applications etc.

As our world turned, the need for help in the troubled teen industry grew.  It became a new outlet for EC’s to make money.  As the Internet was growing, more and more parents and teens were able to do all their college searches online – and get information at their finger tips.

Well, the Internet has expanded again – with the help of Facebook, Blogs, forums etc more parents are able to do their searches for residential therapy without the help and extra fees of an EC.  However, it is difficult to decide what is best for your teenager or what online information is true, false or fabricated.

As a parent of a troubled teen, I went through all these motions.  From the EC to the Internet scams – I hit it all.  My story is not a happy one, however it is one that thousands of families have learned from.

I ended up with a program that did more harm than good, and with that, followed years of litigation and my strong desire to find out what this “big business of teen help” is all about.

For over a decade I have made it my mission – I have seen and visited many good, bad and ugly programs.  But what I have heard over and over again is the EC Shuffle which is just as disturbing as finding a bad program.

Almost every family I spoke with that hired an EC were given the same advice – Wilderness – then we will see – and of course, by the fourth week of Wilderness they are telling the parents – we need to go to step two – a residential boarding school….. So this teen that thought he was leaving to go home within 6-8 weeks now finds out he is going to yet another program.

He/she will have to start all over again with their issues, new program, new staff and more feelings of abandonment all over again.

EC’s have told parents that Wilderness will help break their teen down to be better prepared for a therapeutic boarding school – but correct me if I am wrong, isn’t our teen already broken?  Why are we looking for help?

Either way, it is just very disheartening that when parents are at their weakest moment they believe what they hear from what they assume are experts.

Full Disclosure: I am not against Wilderness programs, many teens have a wonderful experience, but many parents can’t afford them – and please don’t regret it.  There are some good EC’s out there – like every business, you need to do your due diligence.

At the end of the day, you need to find what is best for your teen, as a parent you are capable of making these choices.  You may just need some sound guidance – visit www.HelpYourTeens.com and you will find lists of questions, hints in searching and much more.

I just believe enough is enough when it comes to this EC Shuffle….

Fresh Air Fund: Summer Opportunity for all Families

The time is NOW! Yes, many people are struggling with today’s economy, but one way to feel fulfilled is to give a piece of yourself and your family to a child that has none.  You don’t have to have a million dollars to give a child a fun summer.  Just being there, playing ball, swimming or any other family activity is what many children crave.

If you or someone you know is able to host, please sign up now. In 2010, The Fresh Air Fund’s Volunteer Host Family program, called Friendly Town, gave close to 5,000 New York City boys and girls, ages six to 18, free summer experiences in the country and the suburbs. Volunteer host families shared their friendship and homes up to two weeks or more in 13 Northeastern states from Virginia to Maine and Canada.

Thanks to host families who open up their homes for a few weeks each summer, children growing up in New York City’s toughest neighborhoods have experienced the joys of Fresh Air experiences.

More than 65% of all children are reinvited to stay with their host family, year after year.

“It is rewarding to see the smile on our Fresh Air child’s face as she enjoys the simple things we take for granted…”

Friendly Town host families are volunteers who live in the suburbs or small town communities. Host families range in size, ethnicity and background, but share the desire to open their hearts and homes to give city children an experience they will never forget.

Hosts say the Fresh Air experience is as enriching for their own families, as it is for the inner-city children. There are no financial requirements for hosting a child. Volunteers may request the age-group and gender of the Fresh Air youngster they would like to host. Stories about real Fresh Air host families and their New York City visitors are just a click away!

Click here to learn more about becoming a host or call (800) 367-0003!

Fresh Air children are boys and girls, six to 18 years old, who live in New York City. Children on first-time visits are six to 12 years old and stay for either one or two weeks. Youngsters who are re-invited by the same family may continue with The Fund through age 18, and many enjoy longer summertime visits, year after year. A visit to the home of a warm and loving volunteer host family can make all the difference in the world to an inner-city child. All it takes to create lifelong memories is laughing in the sunshine and making new friends.

The majority of Fresh Air children are from low-income communities. These are often families without the resources to send their children on summer vacations. Most inner-city youngsters grow up in towering apartment buildings without large, open, outdoor play spaces. Concrete playgrounds cannot replace the freedom of running barefoot through the grass or riding bikes down country lanes.

Fresh Air children are registered by more than 90 participating social service and community organizations located in disadvantaged neighborhoods in the five boroughs of New York City. These community-based agencies are in close contact with children in need of summer experiences in rural and suburban areas. Each agency is responsible for registering children for the program.

What do Fresh Air children enjoy?

• Playing in the backyard



• Laughing in the sunshine
• Catching fireflies
• Riding bicycles
• Learning to swim
• Running barefoot through the grass
• Gazing at the stars on moonlit nights
• Building sandcastles
• Making new friends
• Simple pleasures of life away from the inner-city

The Fresh Air Fund at the Five Boro Bike Tour

Join The Fresh Air Fund at the Five Boro Bike Tour on May 1st! The largest recreational cycling event in America, the TD Bank Five Boro Bike Tour, leads bikers on a 42-mile fun course through the city and you can be a part of it! The Fund provides guaranteed entry into the event in exchange for a fundraising minimum. What better way to bike through an amazing route while knowing that the money you raise will help children from low-income communities who live throughout the city. Along the way, bikers will enjoy entertainment, rider photos, bike repair, medical support and the company of thousands of well-wishers! Click here for more information about the race! If you have questions or are interested in participating, please call Kate Brinkerhoff at (212) 897-8890 or email kbrinkerhoff@freshair.org.

Wilderness Programs: Short Term Program, Very Short Term Results

Wilderness Programs: Think Twice

For the many people that know me, they know I don’t believe in Wilderness programs, nor do I advocate for short term programs.  This doesn’t mean there aren’t reputable Wilderness programs in our country.  There are, however chances are very good, after your teen attends one – within the first 30 days, the program will tell you it is likely you will need to go on to a residential therapy program.  Which means….

• More money
• Another trip
• Another therapist
• Another schedule
• Etc….

Back to the first one – the costs are exuberant for Wilderness, and to combine it with another at least $50K for a boarding school is simply out of the equation for many families.

I am writing this information today for two reasons.  One, I have received several calls this week alone by parents that fell for the Wilderness road.  Now they are out of money and need  a program, but the funding is no where to be found.  What do you do?  Their teen is back to the streets – smoking the dope and failing in school. (Let’s also remember most Wilderness programs don’t offer academics).

One thing these at-risk teens need is consistency.  Usually for the past several months, even years they have been spiraling out of control, driving down a negative path with a negative peer group.

Going to Wilderness is a great experience – they get to vent to their counselor, talk about their feelings and dig deep inside.  They even get a new appreciation of sleeping in their bed or a bed.  They are also knowing that once they just get through these next 6-8-10 weeks – they are home free.

Now, you tell them they are not home free – they are going to the “next step” - a longer term program.  Now they have to get over the disappointment, anger, resentment and most of all, they have to start all over again with a new therapist – a new staff and a new setting.  Sigh…..

Of course this is the case for the families that can afford that next step.  If they can’t – some will be facing a probation officer or public defender within a few months.  Solid changes and “lasting” changes cannot be made within 6-8-10 weeks.

This is way an average successful program is 6-9-12 months (not weeks).  On the same note, you don’t want programs that are taking your teen completely out of the family for more than 18-24 months – that is not emotionally healthy.  It can contribute to abandonment issues -which can backfire.

Do you want to learn more?  Visit www.HelpYourTeens.com and find out about resources and options for troubled teens.

Are Wilderness program worth it?  It is my opinion of after a decade of talking with thousands of family – no, they simply are not worth it.  That doesn’t mean families they aren’t useful to some people, but from the many I have spoken with – they do have good experiences however know that it is step they didn’t really need.  Of course, we all are different.

When Therapy Isn’t Working for Your Teen

What happened to that sweet 5 year-old you sent off to Kindergarten?
What happened to that athletic tween that loved T-Ball?
What happened to my little angel that loved going to the mall with me?
What happened to my child that always worked so hard to get good grades and always worked to make me proud?

What is happening?

Where did their childhood go?

Today’s society is challenging for teenagers – but can be even more distressful for their parents.  When slowly they watch their good child turn into a tween or teen that they barely recognized.  Underneath the questionable clothing, the piercings we had to reluctantly agree to – and the tattoos they got on their own – our child is deep in there somewhere!

After exhausting all local resources, whether it is an excellent adolescent therapist to local support groups and even out-patient facilities, you are looking at a teen that is heading down a dark road.  It is time for parents to dig deep and find the strength to get their teen the help they need – unfortunately it usually is not at home.

Residential therapy is a big step and a step not to take lightly.  Are you considering a Residential Treatment Center, Therapeutic Boarding School, Military School or other out of home options?  Learn about the differences and find what is best for your teen – visit www.helpyourteens.com.

Read Wit’s End! Advice and Resources for Saving Your Out-of-Control Teen today!