Teen Help: Struggling Teens and Searching for Help

Especially during the holiday season, this can be one of the hardest decisions a parent can make.  The Internet can make it twice as confusing!

Sending a child to a residential program/school is a major decision. It is not one to be taken lightly or to be decided on overnight.

Usually a teen’s behavior has been slowly escalating and a parent knows that deep down things are not getting better.  As much as you hope and pray that things will change, this is only typical teen behavior, sometimes it just isn’t.

With drug use and substance abuse rising – more dangerous and deadly ingredients being used, such as spice and inhalants, parents have reason to be concerned.  It isn’t your marijuana of generations prior – it is so much worse and in many cases – addictive and deadly.

If you have reached your wit’s end and now surfing the Internet for help, remember, anyone can build a website.  Anyone can put up nice pictures and create great content.  You need to do your due diligence.

Years ago I struggled with my own teenager.  I was at my wit’s end.  I didn’t realize what a big business this “teen help industry” was.  Yes, my child needed help, but what we received was anything but that.  My story is a cautionary tale – not one to scare you into not using a program, however on the contrary, you have to get your child help, but you have to do your research in getting them the right help.

Here are some quick tips:

  • Your child is not for sale, try to avoid those marketing arms selling you a list of programs that are not in the best interest of your child’s individual needs.
  • Always speak with an owner or director – Someone that has a vested in your teen’s recovery.  Their reputation is on the line.
  • Wilderness and other short term programs are usually nothing more than a band-aid that will fall off as quickly as the program lasted.  They are expensive camping trips and in most cases the Wilderness program will tell you at about 4 weeks that your teen will need to continue on to a longer term program.  What? Yes, now you go back to the research board and worse than that, your teen will be deflated when he finds out he/she isn’t coming home in 6-9 weeks as they were lead to believe – and they will be starting all over again with a new therapist – new schedule – and new setting.  Don’t get caught up in this “shuffle.”  Start and finish with the same school/program.
  • The average stay should be about 6-9-12 months, depending on your teen.  Anything less is probably non-effective.  Anything more, you may be creating abandonment issues in my opinion.
  • Do you really need an Educational Consultant?  Absolutely not.  You are the parent and no one knows your teen better than you do – with a few tips, you will be able to make some sound choices.

For more helpful hint and tips, please contact www.HelpYourTeens.com for a free consultation. After the ordeal I went through, I created this advocacy organization to help educate parents on finding safe and quality programs.

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Parents Universal Resource Experts – Sue Scheff – Getting Teen Help

we_are_parents_tooParent’s Universal Resource Experts, Inc. (P.U.R.E.™) is an organization that was founded in 2001 by Sue Scheff.  For the past several years Parent’s Universal Resource’s has assisted families with valuable information and resources for their children and teens that are at risk.  Teens that are struggling with today’s peer pressure, experimenting with drugs and alcohol, and simply good kids starting to make bad choices.  We have many very satisfied families that have used our services.  Please take a moment to read some of our testimonials.

Whether you are seeking Boarding Schools, Therapeutic Boarding Schools, Residential Treatment Centers, Wilderness Programs, Christian Schools, Summer Programs, Military Schools and more, Parent’s Universal Resource’s can offer you options to explore to help educate you in a very important decision for your child and family.  We invite you to fill out a Free Consultation Form for more information.

Parent’s Universal Resource Expert’s™ are parents helping parents.  As a parent that experienced and survived a difficult teen, we believe that desperate parents are at high risk of making rash and detrimental decisions in choosing the best placement for their child.  Please take a moment to read my story – “A Parent’s True Story” – which is one the reasons this organization was created. 

As a member of the Better Business Bureau for many years we are an organization that prides ourselves in helping others and bringing families back together

There are many Doctors, Attorney’s, Therapists, Police Departments, Schools, Guidance Counselors, and other professionals that refer Parent’s Universal Resource’s to families.  In many cases, after a family has used our service, they recommend us to their friends and relatives.  We have built our reputation on trust and putting families first.  At Parent’s Universal Resource’s we believe in bringing families back together.

In searching for schools and programs we look for the following:

  • Helping Teens – not Harming Them
  • Building them up – not Breaking them down
  • Positive and Nurturing Environments – not Punitive
  • Family Involvement in Programs – not Isolation from the teen
  • Protect Children – not Punish themIf you are a parent struggling with your teen today, get help, don’t be a parent in denial.  I speak with many parents that believe it is only “smoking pot” – but remember, marijuana is the gateway to other drugs.  Is your child very intelligent, yet failing in school?  Not working up to their academic potential? Underachiever? Dropping out of sports or activities they once loved?  Find out why.
  • witsRead more about my journey with my daughter in Wit’s End! Advice and Resources for Saving Your Out Of Control Teen.

    Learn from my mistakes, gain from my knowledge. You are not alone.

    Sue Scheff: Parents, are you at your Wit’s End?

    Are you a parent of a teenager or pre-teen that is starting to make some poor choices?  They are great kids, but suddenly the decisions they are making are worrying you.  Is there a new circle of friends that you are not familiar with?

     

    Are you at your wit’s end?

     

    As the founder of Parent’s Universal Resource Experts we speak with parents on a daily basis that are struggling with today’s youths. 

    Are you experiencing any of the following situations or feeling at a complete loss or a failure as a parent?  You are not alone and by being a proactive parent you are taking the first step towards healing and bringing your family back together

    • Is your teen escalating out of control?
    • Is your teen becoming more and more defiant and disrespectful?
    • Is your teen manipulative? Running your household?
    • Are you hostage in your own home by your teen’s negative behavior?
    • Is your teen angry, violent or rage outbursts?
    • Is your teen stealing?
    • Is your teen verbally abusive?
    • Is your teen rebellious, destructive and withdrawn?
    • Is your teen aggressive towards others or animals?
    • Is your teen using drugs and/or alcohol?
    • Does your teen belong to a gang?
    • Do they frequently runaway or leave home for extended periods of time?
    • Has their appearance changed – piercing, tattoo’s, inappropriate clothing?
    • Has your teen stopped participating in sports, clubs, church and family functions?  Have they become withdrawn from society?
    • Is your teen very intelligent yet not working up to their potential? Underachiever?  Capable of doing the work yet not interested in education.
    • Is your teen sexually active?
    • Teen pregnancy?  
    • Is your teen a good kid but making bad choices?
    • Undesirable peers? Is your teen a follower or a leader?
    • Low self esteem and low self worth?
    • Lack of motivation?  Low energy?
    • Mood SwingsAnxiety?
    • Teen depressionthat leads to negative behavior?
    • Eating Disorders?  Weight loss? Weight gain?
    • Self-Harm or Self Mutilation?
    • High School drop-out?
    • Suspended or Expelled from school?
    • Suicidal thoughts or attempts?
    • ADD/ADHD/LD/ODD?
    • Is your teen involved in legal problems? Have they been arrested?

     

    Does your teen refuse to take accountability and always blame others for their mistakes?

     

    • Do you feel hopeless, helpless and powerless over what options you have as a parent?  Are you at your wit’s end?

     

     Does any of the above sound familiar?  Many parents are at their wit’s end by the time they contact us, but the most important thing many need to know is you are not alone. 

    There is help but the parent needs to be proactive and educate themselves in getting the right help. Many try local therapy, which is always recommended, but in most cases, this is a very temporary band-aid to a more serious problem.  One or two hours a week with a therapist is usually not enough to make the major changes that need to be done.    

    If you feel you are at your wit’s end and are considering outside resources, it may be time to consider Residential Therapy.  An informed parent is an educated parent and will better prepare to you to make the best decision for your childIn my opinion, it is critical not to place your child out of his/her element. 

    In many cases placing a teen that is just starting to make bad choices into a hard core environment may cause more problems.  Be prepared – do your homework. 

    Many parents are in denial and keep hoping and praying the situation is going to change.  Unfortunately in many cases, the problems usually escalate without immediate attention.  Don’t be parents in denial; be proactive in getting your teen the appropriate help they may need.  Whether it is local therapy or outside the home assistance, be in command of the situation before it spirals out of control and you are at a place of desperation. 

    At wit’s end is not a pleasant place to be, but so many of us have been there. Finding the best school or  residential program for your child is one of the most important steps a parent does.  Remember, your child is not for sale – don’t get drawn into high pressure sales people, learn from my mistakes – gain from my knowledge.  Read my story at www.aparentstruestory.com for the mistakes I made that nearly destroyed my daughter.   

    In searching for schools and programs we look for the following:

    ·         Helping Teens – not Harming them

    ·         Building them up – not Breaking them down

    ·         Positive and Nurturing Environments – not Punitive

    ·         Family Involvement in Programs – not Isolation from the teen

    ·         Protect Children – not Punish them

    Some Informational Websites on Teen Subjects:

    Teen Depression, Teen Runaways, Teen Pregnancy, Teen Internet Addiction, Teen and Youth Gangs

    By Sue Scheff

    Founder of Parent’s Universal Resource Experts

    Author of Wit’s End!

          As seen on 20/20 ABC News, Lifetime Television, CBS News, The Rachael Ray Show, CNN News, Fox News and more!