Precription Drugs, Your Medicine Cabinet and Your Teens: Be AWARE

Be an educated parent, clean our your medicine cabinets!

It’s not just pot, crack or cocaine – you could be contributing to your teen’s drug use.

Many teens believe that taking prescription drugs to get high is safer than using street drugs.

Be AWARxE!

Prescription drugs are dangerous when they are not used correctly as directed by a doctor.

  • One in five teens have taken a prescription drug that was not theirs to get high or to deal with problems.
  • Teens are abusing pain pills (Vicodin®, OxyContin®), stimulants (Ritalin®, Adderall®), and tranquilizers (Xanax®, Valium®).
  • Teens take these drugs right out of the medicine cabinet – at home, at a friend’s house, or when visiting family.
  • 5.2 million people, including kids ages 12 and older, said they had abused prescription pain relievers, as reported in a 2007 survey.
  • More people are visiting the emergency room because they misused prescription pain medication. From 2004 to 2009, emergency room visits due to misusing narcotic pain pills increased by almost 100%.

Learn more at AWARE RX.

Fact:Prescription drugs are the most commonly abused drugs among 12-13 year olds. Many of these pills can be found in your medicine cabinet and around your house.  In an effort to help stop this growing problem, the DEA is hosting a Take-Back Day on April 28, 2012. If you have any unused prescription drugs in your home, you can drop them off at the designated collection site in your community on April 28.

The DEA coordinates with the local law enforcement and community partners to provide thousands of sites across the country, many of them at police departments, so that the unwanted drugs are disposed of safely and legally. Sites will accept pills, both prescription and nonprescription, for disposal.

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Disrespectful Teens: What happened to teens respecting authority today?

When we grew up and our parents told us to be home by 10pm we never questioned them, we were home by 10:00, if not 10 minutes earlier.  We never dared back talked (well, if we did, we learned real fast it was usually the last time we did it).

It seems teenagers today have a sense of entitlement issue.  They have no sense of respect for their parents.  Sometimes we can be fortunate that they do respect their teachers and our neighbors.  However when they come home, they can become a person we don’t recognize.

Again, what happened?

Is it today’s society?  It is peer pressure?  It is the desire to give our kids more than we had? Is it technology?

Honestly, it is a million dollar question that really doesn’t matter, because at the end of the day, some are struggling with a teen that is going down a negative path.  We have once good teens making some very bad choices.  If it escalates to a point that you are actually reading my Blogs – and now seeking outside help – it usually means you have reached your wits end.

Believe it or not, now is the time not to make rash decisions.  Once you have exhausted all you local resources, such as local therapy, your relatives and other programs in your area, you may be ready for residential therapy.  However this is where it gets tricky.

You get online and you type in all sorts of buzz words you before you know it – you are bombarded with all sorts of toll free numbers with promises of help and understanding…. really?  Back up… Realize that the teen help industry is a big business – yes, you may need help, and you may need a school or program, but your teen is not for sale – and you are not going to be scammed.

How do I know this?  I was scammed over a decade ago – I learned the hard way.  I had that teen that was a good teen, before she started making those bad decisions – and then I made a rash decision.  Learn from my mistakes – gain from my knowledge…. Visit – www.helpyourteens.com – and read our story at www.aparentstruestory.com.

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Parents Universal Resource Experts – Sue Scheff: Anger Management and Your Teens

I don’t care what you say I am doing what I want to do! I hate you and you just don’t want me to have fun!”

All my friends are allowed to stay out late; you are mean and want to ruin my life!”

“You have no idea how I feel and you are only making it worse!”

When a difficult teen is out of control, they only can hear themselves and what they want. It is usually their way or no way! There are so many factors that can contribute to these feelings. The feelings are very real and should be addressed as soon as you see that your child is starting to run the household. Teen anger may lead to teen rage and teen violence which can soon destroy a family.

A local therapist can help your family diagnosis what is causing the negative behavior patterns. Conduct Disorder or Oppositional Defiance Disorder (ODD) is some of the many causes to this harmful and stressful behavior. Many times you will find a need for a positive and safe program either local or outside your home are that can  help determine where these hurtful outbursts are stemming from. 

As difficult as this may seem, it is important that as your teen is expressing these feeling of anger and rage, that you as the parent learn to control your emotions.  You don’t want to fuel it or feed it which can potentially enrage it. 

Here are some tips for parents to learn to help manage their stress level as their teens is spiraling out of control:

  1. Take a ‘timeout.‘ Although it may seem cliché, counting to 10 before reacting really can defuse your temper.
  2. Get some space. Take a break from the person you’re angry with until your frustrations subside a bit.
  3. Once you’re calm, express your anger. It’s healthy to express your frustration in a nonconfrontational way. Stewing about it can make the situation worse.
  4. Get some exercise. Physical activity can provide an outlet for your emotions, especially if you’re about to erupt. Go for a brisk walk or a run, swim, lift weights or shoot baskets.
  5. Think carefully before you say anything. Otherwise, you’re likely to say something you’ll regret. It can be helpful to write down what you want to say so that you can stick to the issues. When you’re angry, it’s easy to get sidetracked.
  6. Identify solutions to the situation. Instead of focusing on what made you mad, work with the person who angered you to resolve the issue at hand.
  7. Use ‘I’ statements when describing the problem. This will help you to avoid criticizing or placing blame, which can make the other person angry or resentful – and increase tension. For instance, say, “I’m upset you didn’t help with the housework this evening,” instead of, “You should have helped with the housework.”
  8. Don’t hold a grudge. If you can forgive the other person, it will help you both. It’s unrealistic to expect everyone to behave exactly as you want.
  9. Use humor to release tensions. Lightening up can help diffuse tension. Don’t use sarcasm, though – it’s can hurt feelings and make things worse.
  10. Practice relaxation skills. Learning skills to relax and de-stress can also help control your temper when it may flare up. Practice deep-breathing exercises, visualize a relaxing scene, or repeat a calming word or phrase to yourself, such as “Take it easy.” Other proven ways to ease anger include listening to music, writing in a journal and doing yoga.

These tips from the Mayo Clinic can also be helpful to your teens.  It could benefit you to sit down with your teens and talk about controlling rage and anger before it escalates to the boiling over point.

Be an educated parent, you will have safer and healthier teens.

Read more about this subject.

Parents Universal Resource Experts – Sue Scheff: When Teens Hate Parents

Unfortunately many parents will hear these words when a heated debate comes up and a teenager is not allowed to have or do a specific event/item. Enduring this type of ‘tough love’ is one of the most common paths parents of struggling teens have to travel, hearing these hateful words.

Many cannot understand or grasp the concept of “not enabling” the child to ruin or run the family unit. Enduring life with a teen that is running the home can result in many uproars, conflicts, arguments, battles, and sometimes psychical and verbal abuse. Tough love is exactly that: Tough. Loving our children is unconditional, but we don’t have to like what they are doing or how they are destroying their lives.

There will come a time when a parent realizes enough is enough! This is the time that they need the support from outside sources, such as a support group, along with professional intervention. This does not reflect you as a parent, nor does it place blame on the family, it is the child that is making the bad choices and the family is suffering from it.

Many times tough love is simply letting go. Let the child make their mistakes and they will either learn from them or suffer the consequences. Unfortunately depending on the situation, it is not always feasible to wait until the last minute to intervene. If you see that tough love is not working at home, it may be time to consider residential placement (placement outside the home). Quality residential placements work with the entire family.

While in the whirlwind of confusion, frustration and stress that the child is causing, it is hard to see the actual problem or problems. With time and distance, the healing starts to occur. Tough love is a very painful and stressful avenue, however in some families, very necessary and very rewarding. Tough love if used correctly can be helpful. However if you are the type to give in at the end, all the hard work of standing your ground will be for nothing. Actually, your weakness or giving in could result in deeper and more serious problems. Please confer with professionals or outside help if you feel you are not able to follow through with what you are telling your child you will do. Don’t be ashamed to ask for help, you are certainly not alone.

Learn more about residential therapy at www.helpyourteens.com.

Be an educated parent, you will have a more peaceful home. 

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Parents Universal Resource Experts – Sue Scheff – Getting Teen Help

we_are_parents_tooParent’s Universal Resource Experts, Inc. (P.U.R.E.™) is an organization that was founded in 2001 by Sue Scheff.  For the past several years Parent’s Universal Resource’s has assisted families with valuable information and resources for their children and teens that are at risk.  Teens that are struggling with today’s peer pressure, experimenting with drugs and alcohol, and simply good kids starting to make bad choices.  We have many very satisfied families that have used our services.  Please take a moment to read some of our testimonials.

Whether you are seeking Boarding Schools, Therapeutic Boarding Schools, Residential Treatment Centers, Wilderness Programs, Christian Schools, Summer Programs, Military Schools and more, Parent’s Universal Resource’s can offer you options to explore to help educate you in a very important decision for your child and family.  We invite you to fill out a Free Consultation Form for more information.

Parent’s Universal Resource Expert’s™ are parents helping parents.  As a parent that experienced and survived a difficult teen, we believe that desperate parents are at high risk of making rash and detrimental decisions in choosing the best placement for their child.  Please take a moment to read my story – “A Parent’s True Story” – which is one the reasons this organization was created. 

As a member of the Better Business Bureau for many years we are an organization that prides ourselves in helping others and bringing families back together

There are many Doctors, Attorney’s, Therapists, Police Departments, Schools, Guidance Counselors, and other professionals that refer Parent’s Universal Resource’s to families.  In many cases, after a family has used our service, they recommend us to their friends and relatives.  We have built our reputation on trust and putting families first.  At Parent’s Universal Resource’s we believe in bringing families back together.

In searching for schools and programs we look for the following:

  • Helping Teens – not Harming Them
  • Building them up – not Breaking them down
  • Positive and Nurturing Environments – not Punitive
  • Family Involvement in Programs – not Isolation from the teen
  • Protect Children – not Punish themIf you are a parent struggling with your teen today, get help, don’t be a parent in denial.  I speak with many parents that believe it is only “smoking pot” – but remember, marijuana is the gateway to other drugs.  Is your child very intelligent, yet failing in school?  Not working up to their academic potential? Underachiever? Dropping out of sports or activities they once loved?  Find out why.
  • witsRead more about my journey with my daughter in Wit’s End! Advice and Resources for Saving Your Out Of Control Teen.

    Learn from my mistakes, gain from my knowledge. You are not alone.

    Parents Universal Resource Experts – Sue Scheff – Parenting Difficult Teens

    teentoughloveIt stems back to “children need to have their self-esteem built up to make good decisions.” Today most families are either single parent or both parents are working full time. This is not the fault of the teen, nor is it the fault of the parents. It is today’s world and we must try to find the middle.  Troubled teens, rebellious teens, angry teens, problem teens, difficult teens, depressed teens; unfortunately are part of the society of adolescents today.

    Communication is always the first to go when people get busy. We have seen this over and over again. We have also experienced it and feel that our children shut us out; this can lead to difficult teens and teens with problems. Although we are tired and exhausted, along with the stress of today’s life, we need to stop and take a moment for our kids. Talk and LISTEN to them. Ask lots of questions, get to know their friends and their friend’s parents, take part in their interests, be supportive if they are having a hard time, even if you can’t understand it; be there for them. 

    This all sounds so easy and so simple, but take it from parents that have walked this path, it is not easy. When a parent works a full day, has stress from the job along with household chores, not to mention the bills, it is hard to find that moment. We are all guilty of neglect at one time or another after all, we are only human and can only do so much. We feel the exhaustion mounting watching our teens grow more out of control, yet we are too tired to address it. Out of control teens can completely disrupt a family and cause marriages to break up as well as emotional breakdowns.

    We know many feel it is just a stage, and with some, it may be. However most times it does escalate to where we are today. Researching for help; P.U.R.E. is here for you, as we have been where you are today. Do you have a difficult teen, struggling teen, defiant teen, out of control teen, rebellious teen, angry teen, depressed teen? Do you feel hopeless, at your wits end?  Visit www.helpyourteens.com.

    If you feel your teen is in need of further Boarding School,
    Military School or Program Options, please complete our Information Request Form. Please visit Informational Articles for more beneficial information.  Read more about Parents’ Universal Resource Experts.

    Sue Scheff: Parents, are you at your Wit’s End?

    Are you a parent of a teenager or pre-teen that is starting to make some poor choices?  They are great kids, but suddenly the decisions they are making are worrying you.  Is there a new circle of friends that you are not familiar with?

     

    Are you at your wit’s end?

     

    As the founder of Parent’s Universal Resource Experts we speak with parents on a daily basis that are struggling with today’s youths. 

    Are you experiencing any of the following situations or feeling at a complete loss or a failure as a parent?  You are not alone and by being a proactive parent you are taking the first step towards healing and bringing your family back together

    • Is your teen escalating out of control?
    • Is your teen becoming more and more defiant and disrespectful?
    • Is your teen manipulative? Running your household?
    • Are you hostage in your own home by your teen’s negative behavior?
    • Is your teen angry, violent or rage outbursts?
    • Is your teen stealing?
    • Is your teen verbally abusive?
    • Is your teen rebellious, destructive and withdrawn?
    • Is your teen aggressive towards others or animals?
    • Is your teen using drugs and/or alcohol?
    • Does your teen belong to a gang?
    • Do they frequently runaway or leave home for extended periods of time?
    • Has their appearance changed – piercing, tattoo’s, inappropriate clothing?
    • Has your teen stopped participating in sports, clubs, church and family functions?  Have they become withdrawn from society?
    • Is your teen very intelligent yet not working up to their potential? Underachiever?  Capable of doing the work yet not interested in education.
    • Is your teen sexually active?
    • Teen pregnancy?  
    • Is your teen a good kid but making bad choices?
    • Undesirable peers? Is your teen a follower or a leader?
    • Low self esteem and low self worth?
    • Lack of motivation?  Low energy?
    • Mood SwingsAnxiety?
    • Teen depressionthat leads to negative behavior?
    • Eating Disorders?  Weight loss? Weight gain?
    • Self-Harm or Self Mutilation?
    • High School drop-out?
    • Suspended or Expelled from school?
    • Suicidal thoughts or attempts?
    • ADD/ADHD/LD/ODD?
    • Is your teen involved in legal problems? Have they been arrested?

     

    Does your teen refuse to take accountability and always blame others for their mistakes?

     

    • Do you feel hopeless, helpless and powerless over what options you have as a parent?  Are you at your wit’s end?

     

     Does any of the above sound familiar?  Many parents are at their wit’s end by the time they contact us, but the most important thing many need to know is you are not alone. 

    There is help but the parent needs to be proactive and educate themselves in getting the right help. Many try local therapy, which is always recommended, but in most cases, this is a very temporary band-aid to a more serious problem.  One or two hours a week with a therapist is usually not enough to make the major changes that need to be done.    

    If you feel you are at your wit’s end and are considering outside resources, it may be time to consider Residential Therapy.  An informed parent is an educated parent and will better prepare to you to make the best decision for your childIn my opinion, it is critical not to place your child out of his/her element. 

    In many cases placing a teen that is just starting to make bad choices into a hard core environment may cause more problems.  Be prepared – do your homework. 

    Many parents are in denial and keep hoping and praying the situation is going to change.  Unfortunately in many cases, the problems usually escalate without immediate attention.  Don’t be parents in denial; be proactive in getting your teen the appropriate help they may need.  Whether it is local therapy or outside the home assistance, be in command of the situation before it spirals out of control and you are at a place of desperation. 

    At wit’s end is not a pleasant place to be, but so many of us have been there. Finding the best school or  residential program for your child is one of the most important steps a parent does.  Remember, your child is not for sale – don’t get drawn into high pressure sales people, learn from my mistakes – gain from my knowledge.  Read my story at www.aparentstruestory.com for the mistakes I made that nearly destroyed my daughter.   

    In searching for schools and programs we look for the following:

    ·         Helping Teens – not Harming them

    ·         Building them up – not Breaking them down

    ·         Positive and Nurturing Environments – not Punitive

    ·         Family Involvement in Programs – not Isolation from the teen

    ·         Protect Children – not Punish them

    Some Informational Websites on Teen Subjects:

    Teen Depression, Teen Runaways, Teen Pregnancy, Teen Internet Addiction, Teen and Youth Gangs

    By Sue Scheff

    Founder of Parent’s Universal Resource Experts

    Author of Wit’s End!

          As seen on 20/20 ABC News, Lifetime Television, CBS News, The Rachael Ray Show, CNN News, Fox News and more!